Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Stolen Identity continued...

My identity had been stolen by fear; by passing judgment on myself and others before even giving them a chance, before giving myself a chance. I felt like everyone was shutting me out, that they didn't like me or they thought I was weird or something. Then I realized the obvious--I was the one shutting everyone out, keeping my heart closed toward them and labeling them as unworthy of my trust. And I realized that the reason was that I wasn't comfortable with who I am and not only was I not comfortable with me but I didn't know who I was! So around this time a speaker gave a talk on finding out who you are (God has a funny way of teaching you what you need to learn at exactly the right time). One thing he said was that to find out who you are you have to figure out who you are not. The next morning my friend shared with me that for her devotion she was making a list of everything she wasn't and was then going to write a list of whatever was opposite of the other list. She encouraged me to do the same and I did. So my readers, here is what I am not:

I am not a relationship addict, a flirt or desperate for attention. I am not someone's toy. I am not a bra size or a pant size. I am not the clothes I wear, the house that I live in or the car that I drive. I am not the people I know or the attention I get. I am not the job that I work, the school that I go to or the major I pursue. I am not what people say about me or think about me. I am not how much I talk in groups or how much people notice me. I am not the devil's slave, a slave to others or even a slave to myself. I am not the sins I've committed, the past I'm ashamed of or the problems I've created. I am not alone and I am certainly not forsaken. I am not my struggles, my weaknesses or my insecurities. I am not the mistakes that I make or the stupid things that I say. I am not the instrument I play or the things that I do. I am not how many good quiet times I have in a week or how many times a day I pray. I am not the lies I've believed in the past or the lies that I believe now. I am not stupid, boring or inadequate. I am not ugly, worthless or unimportant. I simply am not.

1 comment:

  1. Easy to let our insecurities dominate our lives, telling us lies about others and ourselves: thus our identity is stolen as you say. Making the list of who we are not is pretty revealing, too, isn’t it! Will you soon tell us what is on the other list?

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